elemtilas wrote: ↑16 Apr 2021 03:27First, of course, I'm sorry for your loss! Three years is a pretty good while to form a deepening relationship, and breaking that up can't possibly be easy for you!All4Ɇn wrote: ↑16 Apr 2021 01:16 Wasn't entirely sure where to post this and hopefully it isn't too personal. I was wondering if anyone here has had any experience with losing the one contact they had to a language and I was wondering how they went about trying to continue learning it if they did. Me and my boyfriend of 3 years recently broke up and he was the only link I had to his native language and culture. I'm just trying to figure out what to do with continuing to practice it or if I even should.
This I don't think is terribly personal. It's basically an open query "where can I interact with people who speak X language?" where "X" is left undefined and for us to guess!
It's really going to depend on several personal and social components of your life: was yóur participation in his language and culture limited to only you two as a couple, or were you developing relationships with his family as well?; how invested are you in this language and culture?; how entangled were your participation in his language and culture with your relationship itself?; do you consider your post-breakup perception of him as a burden that use of the language causes you emotional upset?; as you recover from breakup, would you be much more likely to seek out another boy of the same language community & culture? Another thing to consider is where you live. (You don't tell us that either!, and I at least don't know.) But what kinds of resources do you already know about in your area? --- classes, church groups, civic organisations, restaurants, etc.
The best thing I can say is to go on line and do some basic research. If you and your bf lived in proximity (same city) You might be able to find other people from his same geographic region. Look for cultural groups and churches; if you're in school, there may well be student organisations.
If the language is relatively rare and you live in a highly monolingual region, and you determine that you'd like to continue with the language & culture association, but are willing to keep it separate from your relationships, you could look online for cultural outreach organisations or internet groups focused on that culture, perhaps in Reddit. if there's an embassy or consulate near you, you could go there and see what resources might be available too.
Lastly, the question of "should you do this" is one none of us out here can answer. I can tell you, most emphatically, that if I were in your position, I would really have no choice but to continue. Even after three years, I was sufficiently immersed in the language and culture that if I had to seek a new relationship, it would almost have to be with someone from the same region & culture. I'm no longer entirely certain I could get along with someone from my own culture. But at this point in time, we've been going on 18 years; and there are family considerations that a Native may not fully understand or be on board with.
Sorry I can't be more helpful!, but there it is!
DesEsseintes wrote: ↑16 Apr 2021 05:40I freely admit that I’m only asking cos I’m intensely curious, but would you be willing to tell us what language it is?All4Ɇn wrote: ↑16 Apr 2021 01:16 Wasn't entirely sure where to post this and hopefully it isn't too personal. I was wondering if anyone here has had any experience with losing the one contact they had to a language and I was wondering how they went about trying to continue learning it if they did. Me and my boyfriend of 3 years recently broke up and he was the only link I had to his native language and culture. I'm just trying to figure out what to do with continuing to practice it or if I even should.
Sorry to hear about your breakup.
Thanks for the responses. It’s really appreciated! This is great advice too for what to do next elemtilas. The language is Hungarian actually and I’m currently living in the States